Gifts

Jim and Ann

We are still learning how to relate to our children now that they are adults and have lives of their own.  When they were young, we often gave them advice.  Somewhere between ages thirteen and eighteen, advice no longer worked and we discovered that they had become young adults.  Lately, when our children come home, we admit we feel a little awkward.  Who are these people and what can we offer them?  Our love for them remains overwhelming.  From time to time, they reach out in small, meaningful ways to let us know they, too, still remember the good times we once shared.  As a way of forging a new relationship with our adult children, we would like to offer them five free Valentine gifts.

Our first gift is unconditional love.  The days when we focused on rules are over.  We have become interested observers.  Sometimes we wince inwardly at the decisions they make, or we hold our breath just as we did when they took their first steps.  We still hurt with them if they stumble and cheer when they reach their goals.  In spite of their choices and regardless of whether or not they call on us, we love them.  They live, not by our designs, but according to their own hopes and dreams.

Second, through our daily private dialogue with our Lord, we spread our prayers beneath them.  Like an invisible net, prayer supports and nourishes them in a way that provides strength no matter where they are or what they are doing.

Our third gift is freedom.  With prayer and love, we try to keep our mouths shut when it comes to giving criticism or advice.  If they need either, they will ask.  Not offering either allows them freedom from guilt which would only drive them away.

Fourth, we try to provide interesting role models.  They are traveling the same roads we traveled.  We are only a few steps ahead.  We want them to glimpse aging as a rich, exciting opportunity to do more and become more.  Always, we hope to be people they might want to become.